Give me a break!

Did anybody hear that his Excellence Cde R.G Mugabe cancelled his trip to Bulawayo on a last minute because security corncerns. Someone is not telling the truth somewhere, How can the President be concerned about his safety anywhere in Zimbabwe? No people are as harmless as Zimbabweans let alone people from Matabeleland and Bulawayo in particular. In the eighties we were searched and stripped to the bones. Zimbabwe's secret agents must leave the City of Kings in peace. We are so poor we cannot afford to buy tires for our old raleigh bicycles. Anytime one accusses the Matabele people of threatening the security of the country or worse still the President, is perpetual inflicting fresh pain to the old wounds. The children of the slain do not need to be victimised again like their fathers.

To label the peaceful Matabele as the enemies of the state in order to create false evidence to punish them is to be both cruel and devilish. Something is going on behind the scences and hence they are trying to divert the attention away. For record, the man President Mugabe can go anywhere in Bulawayo like he has done before . Few man on earth are as protected as he s if any. ZANU PF propagandist must stop using us as scape goats for any bad thing going on in their house. If Zimbabwe's president is protected far thousands of miles away from the country, (USA) how much more in Zimbabwe's soil. This might be their plan to victimise voters ahead for the next elections.

The President must have been embarrassed that Bulawayo has no water decades after his false promises to voters in Matabeleland. People are now reduced to destitutes because of his leadership.This is the reason why Bulawayo is an opposition stronghold. As a matter of the ruling party has never won in Mat region except only during the period of voter apathy in the 90s.

The vanishing Zimbabwean pride.

Its amazing how fast one can adjust to the environment they find themselves in. The sooner you adjust the better your life becomes. I have meet a few people here in the Diaspora who have not come to terms with the reality of the life and the culture they live in. The feeling of being in a strange land will never fade away. Recently, while I was driving in the interstate I made a confession to my wife, I said" you what know I think I now know this place more than my own city Bulawayo". This might sound strange to a few unrealistic people most of which are always my company. I said to my wife anytime one leaves a place for a year or less one usually find great changes. So for me to have been away from home seven years and counting, there must been great changes around the neighbourhood.

Let's face it, one way or the other one is forced to adjust to his or her circumstances even without noticing. Adjustment is a fact of life. Most of us who have had friends or relatives coming home from out of the country, must have been whispering amongst ourselves when these folks got home. One could not help notice a few new words. For those from the neighbouring South Africa every other word would be "Mara" or" Cha". Even if one was out of the country for a week or less. I will never forget one of our lady friends who had gone to the States for not more than one calendar year. When she came back home she spoke with a very soft, polished, anglicized American accent. This she would do even if she was speaking Ndebele. These might be extreme cases of adjustments but with time one will surely conform.

Quite often women adjust faster than their male counterparts. Statements like these might make me loose a few women friends, however I just said it in passing. Talking of tribalism have you ever seen a Ndebele woman married to Shona man somewhere in the Capital, "Oh man they act like they are married to a son of a god or a man from another world". Here I will be accused of tribalism, as a matter of fact I have came across that accusation before. Really no offence is intended I just went out of topic. Forgive my analysis. Its just the way sisters behave sometimes, though not all. "For every rule there is an exception", somebody once said.

Well coming to the diaspora most people came here intending to go back home after bettering themselves. This they would have done through hard working and savings to invest in the mother land or by simple education. However not one would have foreseen what we all know today, we find ourselves in vacuum or to put it simple in the middle of nowhere. This really goes to the entire Zimbabwean community here , young and old male or female. Most people are now linking themselves to certain social groups, be it church or even sports. Because people are home sick these groups or clicks are a safe haven from a home away from home. One must fit somewhere! Language, or others social activities make us feel home.

Most weekends me and my homeboys gather to play the spot we know best and that is Soccer. We used to call it Football but now we just say soccer. The reason being here there is American Football. NFL. Unlike at home here Soccer is just for elementary schools, ( primary school) Most Professional soccer players from Africa who come here are forced to join the mainstream workforce. When I came here I never understood The American Football but now I do not only understand it, but also enjoy watching. One would be astonished how Americans are patriotic to this game. They put a world class show for every NFL game. Football stars are richer and popular that Senators or even the President of USA. Its a money spinning league with endorsements of Millions of dollars. Selling of shirts, something which I strongly feel if adopted back home could benefit our struggling soccer stars.

This is the game that made OJ Simpson a household name even though they now hate the mere mention of his name. The man who was acquitted of the murders of his ex wife Nicole , and Ron Goldman her boyfriend. Last week I observed with great sadness as the American media crucify him in an attempted robbery case in Las Vegas Nevada. I would have thought that in a democratic society like this a man is innocent until proven guilty. The press seemed to have a sinister agenda here. Simpson a larger than life former football star who holds unbroken records in the sport, first caught the international sport lite way back in 1994. I remember clearly how the Chronicle and some other Zimbabwean newspapers used to follow the episodes of his trial." The Trial of the century" . The case divided the entire America and the civilized world into two. Black or white. To this day they are still bitter about this black man who escaped justice, they refer to him as a "monster". Like I always say justice like beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Or maybe they think justice delayed is justice denied.

For us Mkhayas we hook up and chat about different issues, here back home and European Soccer we watch on the Satellite dish networks. It is interesting to note that some people who never even play soccer at home have now significantly improved because of the need for company. Amazulu as the Zim Indy team is known are currently in the league. A Social league which they defending Champions from last season. Among the veteran of this team are Mdawini who is also the player coach and Chief executive , Nsimbi, Biya, Bango, Proffesor, Nkinko, Zi, Thiso and Steffi. I wish the guys goodluck this fall.

My friend Zanda is also playing well. I knew this man long back when he used to be one of the delivery guys for Coca cola in and around Bulawayo. While most of the guys are my Luveve Boys from back in the day. Emakhosi le Nzawanazi like Morre. I should not forget Zobha, a man no doubt the best goalie second to myself. Amazulu are hoping to win the Zimexpo trophy nextyear, capitalising on the home advantage. Organisers of the annually Zimexpo are serious enterprenuers. They cash in on unsuspecting homesick Zimbabweans in the diaspora.

Mhlanga draws the line.

Veteran playright, activist and artist non other than Mr Cont Mhlanga has steped up to make a union of actors. The man who is a leader in the industry has a drawn a demacation line for both TV , Radio, Stage actors by maping proffessional guidelines and expectations. The defiant Mhlanga says for a long time he waited patiently for a functioning actors union without progress from Harare. He said the union is to both protect the actors and act as a yardstick for proffesionalism as well as conduct.

The man well known for using his theatre as a stage to address people,s living conditions blamed Cde Albert Nkunzi for keeping actors waiting for over 12 years. He likened his wait as the Zambezi water project which people of Bulawayo and Matabeleland have been waiting for for decades. "As I write this statement my neighbourhood has no drop of water for one week now" he said. Mr Mhlanga further accussed Harare for organising unions only when there is overseas donor funding. "There is no more challenge for us who want to build our industry, sector and country." Cont Mhlanga who founded Amakhosi Theatres which is the only one of its kind in Zimbabwe. Amakhosi Theatres is known as Zimbabwe's Hollywood. Needless to mention that Mhlanga is no stranger to controvesy. He recently produced a play that shot directly to the top brass of Zimbabwe,s leadership. "The Good President" was banned only a few weeks after it took the nation by storm.

The award winning and renowned playright and artist did not mince his words when he castrated his Harare counterparts for "lack of visionary planning and dishonest." The battle line has been drawn, he said. Please do not bring that disastrous culture of management to Matableland, we don't need it here.That concept of management has brought the country to its knees in the past seven years he said. He said from now on all actors and must have have their opinion cards. He told the ZBC, ZTV and IHASA that from now on there is a standard to uphold and live up to. Mhlanga is currently doing works with Hollywood bigtimers in the USA. For a longtime Mr Mhlanga has always mourned the lack of connection between the elected officios in and the people in Matabeleland.

Little mother language.

Okay this Is what your children will talk, since you do not want to teach them .

1) Hamba juba lami bazokucutha phambili. 25% (Go my bird they will eat you ahead.)

2) Akulantombi eyagana inyamazana. 25% (No girl has ever been engaged to an animal).

3) Uzawukhomba umuzi olotshwala. 25% (You shall point at a beer house.)

4) Ikhotha eyikhothayo.25% (It licks the one that licks it.)

5) Akusensuku satshwala. 25% (Its no longer those beer days)

Christians should be Politicians: Poll.

About 56% of our readers said Christians can do a good job being Politicians. 31% said they think its not a good idea, while 18% said they were not sure. I would like to thank all who took their time to poll. Let us beagin shaping the Zimbabwe we want now.

Serious jokes!

It said that a certain proud man would brag about his wife mostly in public especially after he was drunk. So one time while they were leaving the bar, his wife remained behind and the man yelled," Mother of four, let's go home" As usuall he would yell across the whole bar, and this time the wife could not take it anymore, She yelled back" Okay father of one Let's go home"

After a long drive a truck driver pulled to the Live entertainment Pub, She handed $500 to the lady at the reception. The receptionist said to him, Sir with this kind of money we can give you two our best ladies for a special. The truck driver replied, "Mum I do not care, I am just home sick. "

After the hurricane Katrina United States suffered a lot of damage and loss of life. And you know USA was desperate when Cuba and Venezuela offered to help.

A Pastor spotted a deacon in the front row sleeping during a sermon, Tell us why are you sleeping while I am preaching?, the Pastor asked."You know I trust you pastor, if i didn't I wouldn't be sleeping " replied the deacon.

Its not only history that needs changed!

Many high ranking members of ZANU: PF, especially those who are were In ZAPU have from time to time called for the History of Zimbabawe to be re written. Among those who have voiced that concern are the Vice President Cde Joseph Msika, John Landa Nkomo, Dumiso Dabengwa and Enos Nkala. The chorus have grown louder as the years goes by. I agree that history needs to be rewritten and further than that I would have us look closely at the day to day living of all Zimbabweans. ( Especially the minorities tribes .) Since the simplest definition of history is, "the study of the past"
The fact that History of Zimbabwe needs re written is long overdue. If truth be told things went wrong during the time of the popular Unity Accord in 1987. I must be clear that I do not by any means despise the efforts of the Unity Accord and such reconciliation but the failure to live up to the promises thereof. I have great respect for the late great Vice President of Zimbabwe Dr Joshua Nkomo who is credited for his humility to amicable bring the situation to such a point. If I had time would I write a lot of praise for the "Man Father Zimbabwe", as a matter of fact I already did on the 2nd of July. (Check this blog) Having said that I must acknowledge that Dr Joshua Nkomo overlooked some important factors here in pursuit of peace and the much needed Unity. The Unity accord was one sided hence the name. It was only good for the top brass, because they got positions and drove executive cars living luxuries in Harare.

Most of us will remember that most people in Matabeleland disowned the man Nkomo for allegedly selling out, some to this day. The illustrious leader and revered father and Cde seems to have lost touch with the people who had chosen him. No doubt the he was a national figure but in Matabeleland he let down a lot of people. This is not to suggest he represented one region. I was young by then but I still remember the voices of the neighbors and relatives. Why were the people not happy with Mdala's decession? Its because at that very crucial moment the people lost voice. I am not the right person to answer the question, Would we not rather had peace? Perhaps that was the only way for peace to come about who knows, but for Unity I am sorry to say that dream never came to reality.

It is the Ndebele who paid dearly and heavily for the much needed peace. We paid with our future and the future of our children. Anybody who come from Zimbabwe knows about the unfair opportunities that exist. Today Cde Dumiso Dabengwa a former ZIPRA commander is said to have echoed sang the history song. This is the same man who used to stop people from talking about the imbalances in Zimbabwe when he was in the cabinet. The likes of him John Nkomo and the rest of the top brass ZANU PF Matabeleland leadership missed a lot of chance to represent the dying region they came from. Even the real ZANU PF old guard needed to honor the Unity accord for the sake of the nation wellbeing.
Its no secret that one time the people of Harare used to say "The only thing good about Bulawayo is the Harare , Bulawayo road". It sad to see that not only Ndebele people and Matabeland Midlands regions sidelined but also that some influential Ndebele people were used. Point here is if we slept while other people were caving animals we should not cry foul, especially now that we do have positions. The same guy misled the people when he became a patron of Matabeleland Zambezi Water project. This was the only hope of bringing survival to Bulawayo and the whole region. To this day this project is still a pipe dream. The ZANU pf won a lot of votes in Mat because of the water slogan. Changing of the history of the struggle alone will not help anybody. Let no one be mistaken I want Zipra history as much as everyone does because its our heritage, but we should not stop there, we must go to the real issue behind. Honoring the fallen ZIPRA Cdes is to further their wishes and sacrifices of freedom, equality and prosperity to all deserving sons of the soil.

As I speak right now millions of people in Bulawayo do not have water. They are using the bush to relieve themselves. I wonder if peace and tranquility that we are said to be enjoying is worth living for. I have said this and I will say it again that people of Mat must wake up and take leadership once and for all because waiting for the deadwood of Zanu pf has not helped anybody. Many people think this is tribalism and for me I wonder If developing one area and sidelining another is not tribalism. Our own beloved Mdala when he died, there was still no tarred road to his grave yard in Matopo. Its a shame that science schools are still a handful in Matabeleland, yet in Mashonaland even in rural areas they have science High schools. I can not talk about scholarships, jobs and so on. In 1996 the then first Vice President of Zimbabwe brought 8 buses full to United College of Education, this he did at the expense of the locals. This is just one of the few examples.
Ndebele people do not have a voice, not even in ZBC. The Shona people must understand that it is they who messed up the country by themselves . We are now all suffering yet in good days they ate all the cake and still do. This is not personal, I have Shona friends and relatives but let the truth be told. If Zimbabwe is going to fixed, tribalism must need be zero tolerated. In the 80s and 90s we saw a lot of companies relocate from Bulawayo to Harare. This meant the lack of jobs for the locals and to make matters worse the few that were left were employing people from Mashonaland to work in our own backyard. This was a timed systematic occustrated plan. We had teachers coming all the way from Buhera to teach at primary school who could not speak a word of Ndebele. We saw the young people form Matabeleland leaving the country for neighboring states to look for jobs. This is why some people do not even consider themselves Zimbabwean in the littlest sense of the word. In some places jobs interviews would be done in Shona, and then tell me if that is Unity.

From Dust to the Skies

From Dust to the Skies

The marriage of Church and Politics.

Church and State are like chicken and the egg, quite often we do know which came first. Most people believe that these are two different instituitions which do not need to be mixed together. While it is logical that the churched people make better leaders, it might not be so in the political arena. "You are the light of the world" the bible say. Let your light be seen to all. Rather let me put it this way, People do not know which place is corrupt the church or the state. By now someone is probably thinking I think "He has crossed the line," yes, possibly. My argument here would be, How do you get good leadership from a pool that has no good noone. Point here is the church should be seen outside the sacred buildings. A city on a hill cannot be hidden the scripture says.

Will I be mistaken to say that I am saying the Church is as Corrupt as their government? The church on its own is not complete without the government and neither is the government , both are accountable to God and man. However I may sound, the main problem here is the line betwen the church and state. I do not have problems with the offices here, but rather the people who are in the offices. Many times the the church has called for purity in the government and the govenment calling the same to the church. Who will guard the guard? We all demand acountability, yet noone thinks the other has a right to in each others affairs. One problem I do not have good examples of proper governance and vis versa. The messege here is the light shines even in darkness, so let us begin in the church, since we claim and believe that we are the light of the World (State) This does not make me an unbeliever in either instituitions, but most important are the vessels that are being used.

Before we point a finger let us examine ourselves to see if we measure up. For more on this click comment and post your opinions. Failure of the government to live up to its purpose cripples the church mission as well. The two are like hand and glove, there is need for communication between two instituitions. The church must infuse the community. The sweet aroma of the church must be felt all over the ends of the earth. The market place.

M D.C. Emerge In Indianapolis.

The Movement for Democratic Change an opposition party led by Morgan Tsvangirayi has opened a branch here in Indianapolis. The Indiana branch is currently led by an Interim committe until the elections are held. (Ikhonoindaba managed to get the party flyer and none of these are my words but the words of the Indy MDC branch.)

The party was formed with following mission;

1) To create a platform for all Zimbabweans to come and share ideas.

2) To ( a) Raise the international specter and profile of the very difficult and painful human condition now prevailing in Zimbabwe.

(b) Increase political activism and campaign for (i) the establishment of basic human which encompass the rights to shelter, food, education,heatlth care, free speech, meaning employement, individual respect and and dignity for human life, promotion and realization of individual God _ given talents, (ii) free and electorial and system and democratic governance for the people of Zimbabwe, and (iii) the re- establishmentof the rule of law. in the country.

3) To solicit patnerships with and the support ot the other international democratic instituitions and persons to eliminate the now- almost genocidal suffering of the common people.

Duties and Responsibilties:

1) Mobilize the Zimbabwe (an) community in Indiana to participate in the reclaiming our rights and dignity as an nation.
2) Encourage open debate among citizens of Zimbabwe in order to determine the Zimbabwe that we all want [self determination].
3)Encourage the citizens of Zimbabwe, currently outside the country to , ACT constructively about the condition of the country.
4) To organise a local transparent, dynamic and force full entity to rally the forces for change in Zimbabwe.
5) To call for general meeting to elect substansive office bearers.

Questions on everybody' s mind;

1) Why is Zimbabwe in the state it is right now?
2) What are the causes of all the problems in the country.
3) Is the situation going to get better? When and how long?

4) Do I want change?And what sort of change? How and for how ow can change be brought about?

5)Do I have a part to play? And what is that?

6) Why at the stroke of a pen should my rights be taken away?

7)Why should it be a crime to choose my own leaders or have a different point of view?
8)Does the political elite care about the life or lack of the ordinary citizens?

9) What can the collective citizens do for themselves?

10)What kind of Zimbabwe do I want?

The Zimbabwean Syndrome:

1) Zimbabweans are regarded as politically inept and docile.
2) We do not seem to want to take responsiblity for our destiny.
3)We always let someone else do for us what we should do for ourselves.
4)We would rather run away from a problem than confront it.

Who can be party to this?

1 ) Every Zimbabwean has a right to belong to this organization if and when they want.
2) There is no discrimination based on color, tribe , religion or any other divisive element. We should all join hands and work together to dislodge tyranny in the country of birth.
3) Everyone of us can contribute and bring meaningful to the table efforts.

WHAT IS YOUR PART?

1)Contribute to the debate and help answerat least one of the above questions, And more.
2) Lend your voice to the growing voices of dissent.
3) Play your part and BECOME A MEMBER OF MDC.

Believe it or not.

-In Ottumwa, Iowa it is unlawful for any male person, within corprate limits, to wink at any female person with whom he is unaquainted.

-In Los Angels you cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.

-In Pennsylvania any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send a rockect signal, wait ten minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continues.

-New York it is aganist the law to throw the ball at someone,s head for fun.

-Utah: It is aganist the law to fish from a horseback.

-Harthahorne City, Oklahoma it is unlawful to put any hypotinized person in a display window.

-Fair banks, Alaska it is illegal to give adult beverages to a moose.

- San francisco, California it is illegal to wipe' s car with used underwear.

-Chicago Illinois it is illegal to fish in one's pyjamas.

-North Andover, Masashusetts it is illegal for citizen to carry "space guns"

-Alabama it is illegal for a driver to blindfolded while operating a vehicle.

-Baltimore it is illegal to throw bales of hay from a second -story window within the city limits.

Ndlovu to Stay at Bosso.

The Highlanders executive dissimissed calls from some fans who needed the coaching reshuffled. The Chairman Mr E Sibanda said it was too early for the fans to painc. According to the Chronicle Sibanda the executive is willing to listein to the fans through proper channels. He down played Sunday's emergency meeting as a routine review that was already sheduled. He asid there is no way the committe could change the coaching department at this time of the year. He appealed to fans to be patient going to the extent of saying even big European teams go through such spells some time.

Things fall apart at Highlanders Camp.

It dosen't take rocket scientist to know that Zimbawe,s soccer Champions are under going a severely difficult time. This weekend saw the team lose to a little known and newly promoted minor soccer team Lengthens FC. The Zimbabwe,s oldest team suffered a devastaing loss at home, drowning the hopes of the faithful fans who still have Championship hopes, with the team behind Dynamos by two points. The 4 to 1 defeat sounded heaviy to legions of black and white colored religious fans. It must noted be that highlanders fans are probably the most impatient fans any team can have. Even with this background,the fans from the begining of the year had already expressed disatisfaction at the way the coaching was handling things, this went on even to a point were the executive had to investigate the allegations of favouratism and bribery among the coaching staff. The Sibanda lead exucutive came out satisfied that none of this was true. Enerst Mapepa was a dalling in his days as a player, is still commands the same respect decades after he hanged the boots. The man is at the helm of Tshilamoya or Bossolona depending on which name you want to use.

The beloved Chairman had not been shaken until Sunday, when one could hear the drop of a pin at the traditional team slaughter house Babourfields. Many fans are said to be calling for the head of the coach Methembe Ndlovu. They accuse him of trying to bring United States College soccer to the Premier league at Highlanders. Some do not like his 4-1 4-1 formation saying its too defensive, Some go on to accuse him and his assistants of bias when it comes to the selection of the team. As if that is not enough they go on to say he does not position players by thier abilities. They say he is always experimenting at the expense of the team. However founded or unfounded the accusations may be its clear that there an Indaba in Bulawayo. Some fans are threatening to quit coming to the games unless mayor changes his ways or the exeutive relieve him of the hot sit. These were sentiments expressed by fans interviewed by the local daily the Chronicle. Most of us will remember that when the team loses the paper aslo suffers heavy loses in sales. The partnership between the two goes way back in time.

Methembe or Mayor as we call him is a humble gentleman and a friend to me. The man under fire is both a home boy and a former school mate to me. The down to earth soft spoken dreadlocked man is different from the picture the media is painting. Ndlovu a son of Highlanders himself and a former Zimbabwe under 23 superstar is in many ways an accomplished man. I know no dedicated soccer envoy and a sold out sportman than the above mention man. I have no time to begin to open his achiements because frankly I would need weeks to be able to compile them.A respected coach even here in United States for winning Champion ships several times. Like I always say any time you get an opportunity acknowledge your folks. Mayor is a success story to me. He ranks in the like of Thulani Biya Ncube, Ronald Gidiza Sibanda, Bongani Mafu and Lovemore Ncube. For him and these guys to have come out of my neighbour hood makes me proud. Needeless to say that me and Ndlovu were once in the same time at junior team at grade school. That makes me feel like a star when ever he achieves something. Somebody once said you are not successful until someone claims to have gone to school with you.

When the man Methembe came home from the US, his first season as a coach he wasted no time in claiming the Championship at Highlanders. At the time he was praised as a genious who mixed American Football and Soccer together to come up with a winning formular. It is clear that his honemoon days with Bosso might be over. At this point and time the executive which is said to have immediatedly call an emergency meeting after the Suday's game has not relised the results or the outcome of the meeting. The stakes are high here and anything can happen in soccer but the Tshilamoya machine is not willing to gamble thei Championships hopes. Good luck to High High but to Ndlovu I think its time to move on mfanekhaya. You will alwas be a hero after all. AmaZulu Indiana will always be behind you.

Labouring to rest.

There seems to be no rest on sight for many African workers as United States celebrate the labour day. This long weeken is one of the country; s major holidays.For most of us Africans its a day like any other because we usually take those jobs or shifts that the locals will not take. Due to the many factors immigrants tends to forfeit their education just to survive here. Many acomplished people are reduced to ordinary jack and gills given that fact. Acccent here is a major factor apart from education. The fact that somebody has a different accent means that they do not know English. So one is unlikely to have a management post or a well paying job. For starters most of the jobs we do are warehouse jobs, fast foods gas stations attendents, hotel or banquet serving and nursing homes just to mention a few. Some of these situations might be from documentation or simply the availability.

On the other hand it is pleasing to note that ther are some living the dream, thank God. For most its double shifts, overtime, two jobs and so on. In Zimbabwe not many people worked hard physically or manually labour but here its a common. America prospers because of cheap labour not only from here but from other countries like the East Asian countries. Sad to say some of these countries use child labour, a practice which United States politicans condem. Nowhere in the world is the culture of hard work in operation like the United States of America, that I cannot take away from them. Truckers are some of the major employers. Anytime you drive the freeway day or night you will see them moving from state to state.

The Mexicans are the hardest working group of people here, and they also have serious documentation problems. Most of them do not understand or are at least not fluent in English and that is also disadvantage for them. Due to the declining economies in Africa, we have seen retired people coming to find jobs in United States. This is how poor we are. As we join the rest of America in celebrating Labour day , we cannot answer ask ouselves the big question, When will we rest? The retirement age has gone up to seventy here, thanks to the wonders of medical science. I will always talk about this old man who was my neighbour, one time while visiting him in his house, I saw a sign on the wall, "I am too old to work but too poor to quit." With the situation worsening back home one cannot laugh at my old neighbour. Perhaps ours is the labour of love.

Just for laughs!

Warning these jokes might be not be political correct. I got some of them from my friends who are from different tribes in Zim. In case they read they must know I am not going to write their names without permission.

1) On a super charged Highlanders and Dynamos match at B/F a Bosso, a fan from the Capital sat on the Soweto stand with the rest of die hard bosso fans. While Madinda was attacking he stood and was heard saying" Hampaa hampaa Mandindaa ". For the first time people around were suspicous of him. Again the same player was attacking and the man stood up and said" Shaya wenna Madindaa mani" and soon man was asked to leave the stand by the home fans.


2) In Sizinda two guys were moving goods atfer one of them had found a room to logde. Needless to say that the guys were from eastern side of Zimbabwe. As they were moving in they were talking," Bata kuside kwako iwe" . And the old lady whose hous ethey were moving into complained "Hawu Kanti ngopasi, mina angibafuni opasi lapha emzini wami hatshi, phumani phumani liphele"

3) In one Zimbabwe occasion here in the States one Shona guy was heard complaining" Look what the Ndebeles are doing! We Zimbabweans must not follow what the Ndebeles are doing he continued."

4) Last week students at Virginia Tech retuned to school, most will remember the infamous tragedy that claimed about 31 students last spring. Sad and regreatable incident, I pray for the safey of kids in schools and colleges. To hell with rage and madness In the school facilities. The sad incident exposed the Police. Have you ever seen the video of the police officer running soon after the alleged shootings. The officer is so overweight he can hardly walk yet he is trying to run. Check it next time. I pray for the families of victims and the safety of the school. God bless Virginia Tech.